Child Development Milestones: 3 to 5 Years

Level: Intermediate

Between 3 and 5, children become much more independent. They talk in full sentences, make real friends, and get ready to start school. For a nanny, this age brings lots of fun conversations and creative play.

What you might see

Movement

They hop, climb, swing and ride a tricycle or balance bike.

They can catch and throw a ball.

They use scissors, draw people (often with arms coming out of the head!), and start to write some letters.

They can dress themselves, though buttons and shoelaces may still be difficult.

Communication

They speak in full sentences and tell stories about their day.

By around 4, most strangers can understand what they say.

They ask "why?" and "how?" questions all the time.

They enjoy jokes, rhymes and silly words.

Social and emotional

They play together with friends and make up games with rules.

They are better at sharing and taking turns, but still need help.

They start to understand other people's feelings.

They may have fears, like the dark, monsters or dogs.

Thinking

They can count, name colours, and recognise some letters, especially the letters in their name.

They understand simple time words: "after lunch", "tomorrow".

They remember parts of stories and can guess what happens next.

Self-care

Most are toilet trained during the day.

They can wash their hands, use a fork and spoon, and help to tidy up.

How you can help

Encourage independence. Let them dress themselves, pour their own water, and carry their own bag, with help when needed.

Talk about feelings and friendships: "How do you think Sam felt when you took his car?"

Read every day and ask questions about the story: "What do you think will happen next?"

Play games with rules, like snap, simple board games or hide and seek.

Help them get ready for school with routines: sitting for short activities, following instructions, going to the toilet alone.

Take their fears seriously. Don't laugh at them. Listen, comfort, and talk about it.

When to talk to the parents

Mention it if the child:

is still hard for strangers to understand by around 4

can't follow instructions with two steps ("Get your coat and put on your shoes")

doesn't play pretend games or play with other children

seems very anxious, withdrawn or aggressive a lot of the time

has a lot of difficulty with drawing, catching or climbing

stops doing something they could do before

Useful phrases

"She wrote the first letter of her name today!"

"He told me a long story about a dragon at lunch. He has a great imagination."

"They argued over a toy, but they sorted it out themselves in the end."

"He seems a bit worried about starting school. Has he talked to you about it?"

Vocabulary

WordMeaning

imaginationthe ability to create new ideas and pictures in your mind

to follow instructionsto do what someone asks

toilet trainedable to use the toilet without help

school readyhaving the skills to start school

withdrawnvery quiet, not wanting to talk or play

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